White Elephant gift exchange rules

In a White Elephant exchange, also called a Yankee swap, everyone brings one wrapped gift and everyone leaves with one, but nobody knows which until the game is over, because opened gifts can be stolen. It suits office parties and large family gatherings where people don’t all know each other well: nobody has to shop for a particular person, and the stealing turns a pile of presents into a game the whole room watches.

It’s different from Secret Santa. In Secret Santa, a draw gives each person someone to buy for, and the gift is chosen for them. In White Elephant, gifts are bought for nobody in particular and change hands during the game. If you want gifts chosen with a person in mind, run a Secret Santa draw instead.

1. Everyone brings one wrapped gift. Within the price limit you agreed, wrapped so nobody can tell what it is. The gifts go in one pile.
2. Draw numbers for the order. Write 1 to however many players on slips of paper and have everyone draw one. Number 1 goes first.
3. The first player opens a gift. They pick any gift from the pile, unwrap it so everyone can see, and hold it.
4. Each next player chooses: open or steal. They either unwrap a new gift from the pile, or take an opened gift from someone who already has one.
5. Whoever loses a gift chooses again. They can open a new gift or steal a different one, but not take back the gift that was just taken from them. Their choice doesn’t use up anyone else’s turn.
6. The game ends when the last gift is opened. Then the first player, who had no choice at the start, may swap their gift for any other one, if your group plays that rule.

How many times can a gift be stolen?

Without a limit, a popular gift can bounce around the room forever. A common rule is that a gift is frozen after its third steal: whoever takes it the third time keeps it. Some groups use two to keep the game short.

Can you steal back right away?

Almost every group says no: you can’t take back the gift that was just taken from you on the same turn. Some also ban stealing the same gift twice in one turn.

Does the first player get a final swap?

Player 1 opens a gift with nothing to steal, which is the worst position in the game. Letting them make one last swap at the end, with any gift that isn’t frozen, evens it out. If you play that rule, say so before the numbers are drawn.

What’s the price limit, and what kind of gift?

Pick one amount and call it a target, not just a maximum, so gifts end up roughly equal. Then decide the tone: useful gifts, funny gifts, or a mix. A mixed pile is fun, but say so, so nobody brings a good bottle of olive oil to a pile of singing fish and feels cheated.

• Allow time. Each turn takes a minute or two once stealing starts, so twenty people can take most of an hour. With a big group, set a short time for each turn.
• Make opening a show. Ask each person to hold up what they opened so everyone can see it; the game only works if people know what’s worth stealing.
• Keep score of steals. Put a sticky note on each opened gift and add a mark for every steal, so nobody argues about whether a gift is frozen.
• Have a plan for people who can’t come. Someone can play their number for them, or they can join by video and say open or steal while a friend handles the gift.
• Be kind about the last few turns. Late players have the most choice. If someone ends up with a gift they really can’t use, quiet trades after the game are fine.

Running a Secret Santa instead? See our guides to the office and family versions, and how to do one without email. All our guides are on Guides.